Top Ten Reasons Why Blair Is Leaving St. Matthew’s

by Rosa Uy

Shared on Blair’s last service, January 2, 2022

When Blair called me to tell me she is leaving St. Matthew’s.  I was devastated because  I was counting on her to officiate my funeral. Why would she  leave St. Matthew’s, we are not trouble makers, we have our acts together both financially and spiritually.  So I have a top 10  reasons why Blair is leaving St. Matthew’s:

  • #10: She worked hard on her discernment and it worked.
  • #9: The bishop offered her a bigger office.
  • #8: She prefers the title CANON.
  • #7: She needs more time for tennis.
  • #6: She is looking something better than bacon fried rice.
  • #5: She is suffering from empty nest syndrome.
  • #4: She can not pass her boiler license.
  • #3: She  is in competition with Dwight.
  • #2: She can not get her 7 minutes welcome down to 5 minutes.
  • #1: She is afraid you might notice her recycled sermons.